A Quieter Kind of Courage

EPISODE 2

A conversation with Liz Tilley

On the voices we listen to, the wisdom we carry within us, and finding the courage to slow down.

About this conversation

I first met Liz Tilley after I wasn’t selected for a leadership development program at work.

As something of a consolation prize, I was offered a coaching session with Liz.

It turned out to be anything but a consolation prize!

That first conversation introduced me to the idea of the inner mentor — the quieter, wiser voice within us that can so easily be drowned out by expectation, fear and the noise of everyday life.

It also introduced me to my inner critic, who I eventually came to know rather affectionately as Stern Babette.

But Liz’s influence on me has gone far beyond my career.

She has helped me understand myself differently, trust myself more deeply, and recognise that wisdom does not always arrive loudly. Sometimes it asks us to stop. To listen. To notice what our body is telling us. To become quiet enough to hear what we already know.

In this conversation, Liz and I explore the experiences that shaped the woman behind the coach — from her early career in television and communications, to motherhood, the Canberra bushfires, chronic illness, coaching, women’s circles, creativity, burnout and the ongoing work of learning to listen to herself.

We talk about the inner critic and the inner mentor. About the messages women absorb around service, achievement and putting others first. About leadership and presence. About the wisdom held in the body. And about what can happen when, instead of automatically pushing through, we ask ourselves a very different question:

What do I actually need in this moment?

Perhaps most of all, this is a conversation about courage.

Not only the courage to leap, strive or keep going.

But the quieter kind.

The courage to pause.
The courage to trust yourself.
And sometimes, the courage to turn the car around and go home.

Meet Liz

Liz Tilley is a leadership and executive coach whose work is grounded in curiosity, deep listening and helping people reconnect with their own wisdom.

She describes herself as “the coach for women who want to change the world — in large ways and small ones.”

Based in Canberra, Liz has been coaching for more than 12 years and works with mid- to senior-level leaders across Australia and internationally, helping women unlock their power and potential and navigate the complexity of leadership, work and life.

Her career has taken a wonderfully varied path.

She trained in communications and journalism, spent around a decade working in television, and went on to build more than 25 years of experience across communications roles in government, the not-for-profit sector and the corporate world. A role with the Defence Abuse Response Taskforce became an unexpected turning point, introducing her to restorative practice and to some of Australia’s leading coaches, mediators and facilitators.

In 2014, Liz began formal coaching training — the start of a new chapter that would eventually become her life’s work.

Her approach draws together leadership, psychology-informed coaching practices, mindfulness, creativity, nature and the body. She is fascinated by human development, neuroscience and transformation, and by the ways we can reconnect with the deep wisdom we each carry within us.

Alongside her coaching, Liz facilitates women’s circles and retreats. She believes there is something deeply healing in the ancient practice of women gathering in circle — to listen, to be witnessed, and to reconnect with ourselves and one another.

At the heart of all of her work is a belief that we carry far more wisdom than we realise — and that meaningful change begins when we create enough stillness to hear it.

And beneath the coach is a partner, a mother of three, and a creative soul who loves colour, books, pre-loved fashion, deep conversation, bringing people together, and the joy of continually discovering what else might be possible.

Discover more about Liz and her work at Liz Tilley Coaching.

From our conversation

When the body says enough

For much of her life, Liz pushed through.

She was capable, energetic and so accustomed to getting things done that she did not always recognise she was pushing at all.

Living with chronic illness began to change that relationship.

Liz now describes having an ongoing conversation with her body — pausing to ask: Do I have capacity for this? Will this drain me, nourish me, or simply ask too much?

She shares moments when she has been dressed, in the car and on her way somewhere, only to stop, listen and turn around.

In a culture that rewards endurance, choosing to listen can feel radical. Sometimes the bravest thing is not to keep going, but to honour what your body is asking of you.

A quieter kind of courage

For much of our lives, courage can look like action.

Taking the leap. Speaking up. Climbing higher. Pushing through fear.

But our conversation keeps returning somewhere quieter.

Liz shares what becomes possible when we approach uncertainty from a place of stillness, trust and connection rather than force.

And something clicks for me.

Perhaps courage can be quiet.

Whether we are making a personal decision, navigating leadership or finding our way through a difficult season, there can be enormous power in slowing down enough to hear ourselves.

Not every answer is found by doing more.

Sometimes the next step only becomes visible when we stop.

The wisdom was there all along

When people come to coaching, they may believe they are looking for an answer, a strategy or someone to tell them what to do.

Liz sees something deeper.

Often, what they are really searching for is reconnection with themselves and their own deep wisdom. We explore the idea of the inner mentor — that calm, grounded part of ourselves that is not driven by fear or the need to prove something.

She may not know every step ahead.

But she knows how to meet the next one.

Perhaps the real gift is not finding someone else’s answers, but becoming quiet enough to recognise that the wisdom you were searching for was within you all along.

Something from Liz

Throughout our conversation, Liz generously shares some of the people, ideas and words that have influenced the way she thinks, coaches and moves through the world.

Playing Big — Tara Mohr

Liz’s work with the inner critic and inner mentor was deeply influenced by Tara Mohr, author of Playing Big.

Tara’s work invites women to recognise the voice of the inner critic while learning to access the quieter wisdom of the inner mentor — the part of ourselves that can see beyond fear, self-doubt and the expectations of others.

It is a framework Liz has woven into her own coaching and one that has had a profound influence on me personally.

Alok Vaid-Menon

Liz also introduces me to the work of Alok Vaid-Menon (ALOK) — an American writer, performance artist and public speaker whose work explores gender, identity and belonging.

Liz reflects on Alok’s perspective that listening to non-binary and gender-nonconforming people can help us question the structures and assumptions we have inherited about what it means to be masculine or feminine.

It is another invitation within our conversation to become curious about what we have accepted as fixed — and what might become possible when we are willing to see differently.

How Brave You Are for Slowing Down, by Layla El-Ajlouni

“So come, be softly brave. Be a new, quieter kind of hero.”

Near the end of our conversation, Liz shares a poem that seems to gather together so many of the threads we have been exploring.

It is an invitation to reconsider the people we call courageous.

Not only those who achieve, produce, push and endure — but those willing to honour their limits, listen to their bodies and resist the relentless demand for more.

A reminder that slowing down can itself be an act of courage.

And perhaps even an act of rebellion.

After the conversation

Some conversations give us new ideas. Others give language to something we have been slowly beginning to understand.

This one did both.

For a long time, I associated courage with movement — stepping forward, persisting, trying again.

My conversation with Liz reminded me there is another kind.

The courage to become still. To listen when your body says enough. To question the voice that measures your worth by how much you achieve or give. And to trust the quieter voice beneath the noise.

Stern Babette may not disappear.

But I am learning she does not always need to be the one holding the key.

Continue the conversation

What does courage look like for you now?

Has there been a time when slowing down, saying no or listening to yourself required more courage than simply pushing through?

I would love to hear what stayed with you after this conversation.